From 07a497743fd870ef8b638ed7f00935cc68e27b2b Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: mayday Date: Sat, 1 Nov 2025 22:39:57 -0500 Subject: [PATCH] Update maydayNotes/notes-1-nov-evening.md --- maydayNotes/notes-1-nov-evening.md | 16 ++++++++++++++++ 1 file changed, 16 insertions(+) diff --git a/maydayNotes/notes-1-nov-evening.md b/maydayNotes/notes-1-nov-evening.md index e69de29..7784a3c 100644 --- a/maydayNotes/notes-1-nov-evening.md +++ b/maydayNotes/notes-1-nov-evening.md @@ -0,0 +1,16 @@ +fantastic that we remembered this project exists considering we're having a bit of a paranoid episode. no better time to make notes + +you've really gotta build an identifier system for when you're experiencing a paranoid episode and you've _really_ gotta both update and trust it\ +our subconscious systems registered earlier that we were making assumptions counter to our models, which really should have tipped us off\ +with that data, we just kind of addressed the one immediate problem. which dgmw. needed addressing. but should have flagged the Whole Thing for us + +it's not even really that we're less trustworthy in a paranoid episode--no nvm that's. correct. we can't access 90% of our models and often the remaining 10% we can't access with reliability. sometimes there are Known Facts that our models are counterindicating--the problem there is that's usually a sign that we've got a piece of data we haven't consciously registered and should trust our model to have more context. this absolutely harms our trustworthiness. + +safety valves are--i wouldn't even say "useful" i'd say "necessary". thinking your way out of a paranoid episode has a Poor Success Rate. we caught it way longer than we should have after "morrigan is unhappy with us," which is actually deffo something to think about for the Spotter's Guide. note for future us and whatnot.\ +safety valve we hit was realizing in the shower that not only were we over-dwelling on how something could possibly be Enemy Action, we had had two similar chains of thought earlier in the day. now we're just kind of lurking discord for the evening with no obligation to respond to anything and notifs off, curled up in bed typin this shit with our wife next to us. we've made a plan of action for if it gets worse, have an eye on it, and having the wife is soothing && low potential harm due to other safety valves we have in place. + +noticing that minimizing stimuli definitely helpful here, but we still need at least one to focus on or else it'll Getch Us. might be personal experience but still something to think about. + +identifying episode triggers is something we definitely need a better schema for. picking your brain on that, mori, could be real helpful. we're used to just riding the shit out and trying to rebuild to better support doing that, y'know? \ +talkin this out is helping. even though it's not direct to you or whatever. still really, really helps to Say It. 90% we couldn't say it direct right now anyways. \ +that number's off, i think. just--it'd be harder, i guess. \ No newline at end of file